What are your intersections?
I'm a 2nd generation Latina (Puerto Rican and Mexican). I am a heterosexual female, and have a deep connection with my faith. Up until now, I never really identified as Mexican, because I was raised by my Puerto Rican mom. Growing up there were these undertones of why I shouldn't acknowledge being Mexican, both from white spaces, but also by being mostly around other Puerto Ricans. I am now on a journey to connecting with my Mexican roots, and finding beauty in being both Puerto Rican and Mexican.
What is your background?
I grew up with my mom, and brother. My dad left us before I was born. Not having a father in the home was "my normal" and I didn't fully understand the greater impact of abandonment until later in life. My childhood consisted of a mom that worked a lot ( a minimum of 2 jobs at one time) to provide for us. I recall her greatest desire was to get us out of the south-west side of Chicago, and into the suburbs for better schools. I felt this pressure to get all A's so that I could become "successful", and I studied my butt off, but wasn't challenged intellectually beyond my standard classes. I have strong memories of teachers telling me what I wasn't good at, but very few around the things I was good at. I always had this feeling of never being smart enough...or that I’m just not good enough in general. It's now where I'm unpacking my experiences and putting them into words.
How do your intersections affect you?
I'm still learning "the words" around my experiences as a Latina who doesn't speak Spanish fluently. I've never really fit in white spaces, while at the same time not fitting in Latinx spaces. This constant feeling of not belonging led me further into this belief that I have to rise above by my own means, and prove to everyone that I'm worthy. But worthy of what exactly?!? It's now where I've begun an inner healing journey to find truth in my identity. The more I'm getting healed, the more I've found belonging in myself, just the way I am.
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#TWintersectionalfridays: Space to explore intersections of identity and systems of oppression. Space to tell your story. Space to listen. Every Friday of 2019. // Week 07/52. 'Jasmine' / 8x8 in. / mixed media on paper