Another month has past and here I have October’s inspirations!
WORD:
achy
For most of this month my body has been falling apart. In direct correlation to where I am emotionally, which is directly correlated to where we are politically, it’s been rough. The past two months feels like two years. I write more about my mental/body reactions in my Memory Mondays at the end of this blog. The stress of it all has made me feel achy inside and out, and I’m actually thankful for it. It means that I haven’t divorced myself from my inner life - that I’m aware how I’m a holistic person. Nothing is separated from the other. I wish that there wasn’t so much stress, but that’s part of life! Having hard conversations, being open to the brokenness of the city/nation/world. When the Pittsburg shooting happened, it took everything in me to engage with the reality of it, and I’m glad I did - because grieving for what is so wrong is part of fighting for the good and right - even if it takes a toll on the mind/body.
VISUAL:
“I was further hurt last week when nothing was said about it during church. I understand the complications of addressing issues related to politics from the pulpit but this has reached beyond politics. The politics are only symptomatic. This is about humanity and personhood. Women are hurting. Our faith does not exempt us from these stastitics: 1 in 5 women will be raped at some point in their lives. 1 in 3 women will experience some form of contact sexual violence in their lifetime. The statistics for Indigenous women and women of color are worse. All women are intimately acquainted with the dehumanization of misogyny. I don’t need my pastor to address a partisan Supreme Court nomination hearing, but there is immense value in a male pastor affirming the worth of women. The cultural devaluing of women is so loud, so daily felt by all of us, I don’t believe church leadership can remain silent.”
“But the analysis shows that the #MeToo movement shook, and is still shaking, power structures in society’s most visible sectors. The Times gathered cases of prominent people who lost their main jobs, significant leadership positions or major contracts, and whose ousters were publicly covered in news reports.
Forty-three percent of their replacements were women. Of those, one-third are in news media, one-quarter in government, and one-fifth in entertainment and the arts.”
how megyn kelly’s “blackface” comments reveal a larger truth about appropriation
by Rachel cargle // harpers bazaar
“Systematically is a key word here. A system—one made up of laws, institutions, norms, and standards that perpetuate the harm that racism and xenophobia inflict. The weight of appropriation is often lost in the idea that one small act isn’t a part of the bigger issues we face as a country. I often hear white people brush off the conversation of appropriation in defense of wanting to “celebrate” or “honor” other cultures. I can confidently say that rather than have our traditions paraded for holidays, entertainment, or décor, honor us by voting for our rights, honor us by demanding social justices, honor us by respecting the things we hold dear to our hearts and identities.”
Person:
Rachel elizabeth cargle
THE POWER OF WORDS! Sometimes when I don’t have the words to articulate how I feel/think, Rachel Cargle makes me feel like there’s so much hope in the world. I love the way she writes and just is. I love that she embodies not only the intellectual/academic part of understanding racism, but she also expresses it with emotion. She teaches me how to do it well, without shame, and also how to handle white fragility/ignorance while seeing that the burden shouldn’t be on the POC. FOLLOW HER ON INSTAGRAM.
Shows:
The curious creation of christine mcconnell
This was the perfect getaway show for me this month! It’s a mixture of a cooking show, goth, comedy, and halloween. I LOVED IT.
salt fat acid heat
I guess I was really into cooking shows this month! I really enjoyed this travel/food series also.
sister’s baby shower
I got to go home to the Bay Area earlier this month to host my sister’s, Ashley, baby shower! It was really good for me to go home, sleep in, and relax with family and friends. Escaping the city was exactly what I needed. So excited to meet my first niece/nephew later this month!
MEMORY MONDAYS:
Week 44 of #TWmemorymondays! Let's jump straight in.
I'm addressing racism and the body (again) - how the body tells me something is wrong and then the mind catches up later. Sometimes WAY later.
Back in the college days (2009-2012) as we know things were different than today. People said and did incredibly racist things that wouldn't fly right now at least in my social circles. I remember a guy pointing out my asian woman-ness on a very consistent basis, and on different occasions would do these two things: pull the corners of his eyes to make them slant and also speak Chinese gibberish. All in the name of fun and love of course!!! (Side note: there's also an added element of my intersectionality, where not only was the color of my skin was pulling me down, but the patriarchal dynamic of a male holding social power in those situations was also against me.) What I want to address today is the relationship of my mind and body in those situations.
My mind: That's kind of rude. I don't think I like that at all. You should laugh though, because he's your friend. He doesn't mean it and it's just a joke. Everyone else seems pretty chill about it. Don't make this awkward. Ok the moment has past - just move on and forget about it.
My body - my gut seized up right away in a very particular way that I can identify when it comes to these kind of things. It said: You're hurt. That was hurtful and insensitive and rude and offensive and it's not right. You're angry. Angry that no one else seems to see this as offensive and that you're friend would even say and do that.
Another more recent memory came up while I was thinking about mind/body when it comes to racist comments. A friend of mine was referencing absurd and racist white people who would pull on the eye lids and fake speak chinese, while reenacting those two things in a mocking kind of way toward people who would do that. My body reacted first in that same way as it did before, and my mind justified it by saying: she obviously means to point out how awful people would do and say that and there's no reason why this would be actually offensive. So I let it pass.
It took me long while for me to figure out why my body reacted how it did: it's because not only does it trigger past memories, but it was painful to see a friend embody such offensive gestures and sounds especially as a white person. It forces me to witness and experience something that cuts deep from a person that I care about and who cares for me. I had a great conversation with them later, and I am so thankful that my body was patient with me in realizing those things. It brought not only healing to me, but also with the friend.
I'm still learning to be trusting and attentive to my body. My brain is so programmed and influenced by our white supremest patriarchal society - I need to follow the promptings of my body and catch up to it. It has and will take time, but I'm encouraged with every situation, the time between the two are getting shorter!
Fall colors
Walking to running errands or commuting to work has been so enjoyable.
thank you
Your continual support means a lot to me, and every little bit counts and helps. Thank you!
